Tag Archives: old

If You’re in Your 30s, You’re Not Old

September 5, 2015 By in Grab Bag Tags: , 2 Comments

While I was scrolling through Facebook this morning, I saw this status update from a fellow female writer in LA:

Hey female friends in their 30’s, every time you call yourself “old” the patriarchy wins. ‪#‎Don‬’tBuckleToBullshit

I don’t want to invade her privacy by telling you who she is, but I also don’t not want to give her credit for this awesome piece of advice. So if you’re reading this right now, FB friend, you’re awesome.

This piece of wisdom was so resonant for me! I always self-deprecate and call myself ‘old,’ around younger people especially. When I worked at an arts camp this summer and everyone was younger than me, I would always refer to myself as ‘old.’ Or when I’m interacting with fellow MFA students who are in their early-mid-20s, I call myself ‘old.’

But why am I doing that?  There’s simply no reason to! Being in your 30s is young! In fact, a study showed that women feel their most attractive at age 32. When did we get this idea that you’re an older lady when you turn 30? It’s just not true. In terms of physical appearance, I think there’s such a thing as “growing into your looks.” In your 30s, you understand what looks good on you and how to make your natural assets shine.

Additionally, so many people have started new career paths entirely in their 30s and beyond. Famed comedian Rodney Dangerfield was selling aluminum siding in his 30s, and his film career peaked when he was in his 50s and 60s. That’s just the one example that always comes to mind, but there are a ton of others.

So how about we make a pact to not call ourselves old? Cause it’s kind of like when super attractive people can’t acknowledge how attractive they are. And we all know that sucks.

It’s Never Too Late to Be A Success

March 19, 2015 By in Career Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

I’ve talked about this before, but being in graduate school and being constantly surrounded by hungry, eager 18-21 year olds has a funny way of making you feel inadequate if you’re a 30-something. Sometimes I’ll be sitting having lunch, surrounded by undergraduates, and I’ll feel so far from anything like success. This kind of thinking leads me into a tailspin where I start doubting my career choice, and wondering if it’s time to pursue something else. However, I recently realized that I spend a whole lot of time thinking about a dilemma” and not actually doing anything about it. Being a cerebral person, I often assume I can think my way to an answer. But as we learn in screenwriting 101, thinking is not an action. We would never pay money to watch a person ‘thinking’ on screen.

So I’ve been trying to implement not thinking so much about my career, and just trying to get moving. Have you heard the expression, “You can’t steer a parked car”? Well, there’s a lot of truth to that. If you feel lost, discouraged, or behind in your life or career, just take one single action in the direction you may want to go. And you’re bound to make some mistakes, but that’s part of the process.

And, never, ever believe it’s too late…There are so many people who achieved great success later in life. Here are some famous examples.

  • Rodney Dangerfield didn’t succeed in comedy until his 40s. Before that, he sold aluminum siding!
  • Ray Kroc was a milkshake salesman into his 50s until he founded McDonald’s at 52.
  • Raymond Chandler, wrote his first novel at 52!
  • Tim Zagat quit his job as a lawyer in order to create his namesake book of restaurant reviews when he was 51.
  • Toni Morrison didn’t start writing until her mid-30s and her first novel was published when she was 39.

So, don’t ever let the notion of time get you down. Just shift your car out of parked and start driving.

But Thirty is So Young…

February 19, 2015 By in Grab Bag, Health and Wellness Tags: , , , , , , , , , , 4 Comments

It’s funny how on your journey through your twenties, you always think “Oh man, I can’t believe I’m going to be thirty. I’m getting so OLDDDDD…’

And once you hit thirty, you exclaim ‘Am I an adult now? I’m not a kid anymore… I’m so old. I’m expected to be mature.’

And then, once you’re in your thirties, and especially your later thirties, you try to hide your age because you feel like you’re so old since you aren’t in your twenties anymore. Even the clothing store ‘Forever 21’ reminds us of this every day.

But on my way to work today, I was in a taxi with my coworkers, and we made a remark about how beautiful the beaded gems were that were hanging from our driver’s rearview mirror. We told him how much we liked them.

He thanked us. Then he said that the gems were memorials for his sister and his best friend who had both died tragically of cancer in their thirties.

Their thirties.

A heavy moment of sadness hung in the air. We were silent. We stopped complaining about how we had to work long hours. We stopped complaining about the cold. We definitely weren’t complaining about how old we were in our thirties.

All we could think was ‘they were so young.’

I realize I take so much for granted.  I remember the story of Brittany Maynard, who died at 29 of a terrible disease. I start to grasp what a gift it is to live to 30. Even when things seem terrible, I have to recognize how amazing it is to simply still be alive.

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