There seems to be this idea that if you’re in you’re in your 30s and can afford it, it’s time to say goodbye to roommates and live alone. It’s like there’s a certain period of time for roommates and then it ends. Obviously, this is different in major, expensive cities like NYC (where I think the cheapest studio in a safe neighborhood would begin around $1200 – and that’s a very low estimate. More likely it’s $1300 now.)
A recent NY Mag article, Does Living Alone Drive You Mad? inspired this post today. The article is mostly about older people who live alone, and the author zigs and zags across different ideas, types of people living alone, and varying circumstances. Deep down, the writer seems terrified of living alone for a long period of time, which is understandable as she was married for over 20 years and now has a live-in partner. But it bothered me that the article had a somewhat negative slant.
I lived alone for nearly three years. I loved it! I loved my space, decorating however I liked, coming home to quiet (heaven for an introvert), cooking whatever I pleased, and on and on. But, I guess I assumed, deep down, that it would be temporary. I didn’t know that for sure of course, but I knew that my intention was to meet someone and get partnered up one day. Perhaps that changed my idea then, of what living alone was really like?
I think what the author of the article neglected to talk about was that living alone (if done correctly) forces you to engage with the world outside your door in a more unique, meaningful and appreciative way that living with other people. When I lived alone, I treasured going outside and made a much bigger effort to see friends, go to activities and even just take small walks to the coffee shop.
Imagine – this is all yours to decorate as you choose. Living alone can be like getting to fulfill all your pinterest board fantasies and needing no feedback from anyone else
OMG I'm Thirty 
I have not lived alone myself. I went from living with my Mom to moving right in with my boyfriend. I have wondered what it would be like to just be alone by myself and I think I would really like it. I love my boyfriend but I also love the alone time I have during the day while he is gone at work lol. I think I am more of an introvert so being alone is like heaven to me. 🙂
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I’ve never lived by myself either..I’ve always lived with boyfriends or roommates. And I went from living with my mom to moving in with my boyfriend at the time too, once I was out of college. It’s nice to have time alone when your bf is at work- I totally understand that! And now that I live with roommates, I still have a bathroom in my bedroom, so it’s kind of like a mini-suite..feels like living alone somewhat. Having companions and your own space is sometimes the best of both worlds.
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That sounds lovely! Yes I agree about having the best of both worlds. I think I would go crazy without “me” time 🙂
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Great post, very thought provoking. Although I’ve only ever lived with parents, flatmates & then hubby – I’ve always had a friendly face to come home to (thankfully) and never had too much bother finding my own space. I love peace and quiet, and can occupy myself no probs living on my own, having said that if my hubby has to travel due to work, after a few nights I really look forward to his company. I think (for me) it’s all about finding a good balance of having that companionship but at the same time being able to enjoy time spent on my own too, Karen x 🙂
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Karen, I think you’re right about finding that balance. It’s key.
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I’ve never lived alone but, I can definitely understand the appeal. Although I love my Husband, there are times when I just want peace and quiet when I come home from work. Of course, those are the days that he is exceptionally hyper and chatty. On the other hand, I thinking I’d be a little bit lonely if I lived by myself.
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Sometimes it’s nice to come home to someone..both worlds are good..
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